roaste

Monday, September 26, 2011

Why I Love Zombies


So out of the blue in the past year or so zombies have become very popular, and I am perfectly OK with that. Zombies are just the greatest. End of story. There are so many reasons to love them that you just can't help it.

The first reason to love zombies is there is a type of zombie for every kind of person.

There are the cute zombies that are in "zombie love". They're the one's holding hands with hearts all around them and their organs falling out of their body.
There are the gory zombies that the mega gamers want to shoot in the head so they can see brains, and eye balls cover the refrigerator.
And then there are the original zombies. The ones that are in the classic black and white movies that are slow moving, disease ridden, flesh hungry and generally in suits. I wonder if the epidemic began in an IRS building.

Another reason to love zombies is unless they are right there locked in the same room as you, you can't be afraid of them. They aren't like vampires that will track you down and can out run you. They aren't like werewolves, astounding, animal senses. They just want to eat your face. Can you really blame them for that? I mean just look at you!

And finally, zombies don't try too hard. Unlike vampires, and werewolves, and Frankenstein. Zombies just let it all hang out. They don't try to be super sexy and win the girl. They aren't going around searching for the villagers approval. They don't try and stop their human craving. They are just hungry.

So I am in full support of zombies! I hope you are too. And remember if you see a zombie eating road kill.RUN OVER IT...TWICE! Rule number 4 in Zombieland's 32 Rules of Survival,Double tap!

Go hug a zombie!

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Come here Sparky


I'm back!
Sorry it has been so long since I have posted.

Here is a story my wonderful, beautiful, amazing, momma told me about one of her friends.
Alright so my mom's friend George and his younger sister Veronica everyday would walk up their drive-way after school and see their pet horse, Sparky. The two kids would bring Sparky sugar cubes and apples, and brush his hair, and pet him, and all that good stuff. One Friday afternoon after school Veronica went to pet Sparky and out of the blue he bit her hand. This was very out of the ordinary but it didn't hurt too much. The horses bite drew a little blood but George wasn't too worried. The next week the two kids went up to the fence and Veronica held out an apple and called Sparky. Made the clicking noises "Sparky come here Sparky". When the horse got close and began to reach for the crisp red apple, BANG! Veronica punches Sparky square in the face and says, "Now we're even Sparky".

So, the moral of the story is be cautious of the hand that feeds you.
Hope you have a wonderful night my fellow dummy's!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

GO NERDS!!!

OK. It is time I write about something that isn't about me. What I say may surprise you. But this is about the kids that get "bullied". At Fountain Lake and around this area it isn't the scrawny, nerdy, or intelligent kids that everybody makes fun of. No, to tell you the truth, it is the obnoxious, rude, arrogant kids everybody laughs at and wants to beat down, simply because they are super annoying, especially when they go on and on and on about how cool they are.
When guys continually talk about how manly they are, and how they can get any girl they want by showing off their "hard core" fighting skills we rol our eyes and want to throw chairs at them in English. And usually these guys can't fight at all. When they do fight, it's ugly. pathetic and embarassing. Hearing those guys brag just makes everybody want to beat them up because we don't want to hear it!
The kids that are class president and make straight A's, well, we all love them because they are generally nice, they don't brag all the time and they don't walk around talking about how killer their basketball skills are.
The classic teenage movies make nerd look like they are always at the bottom of the social food chain but at Fountain Lake, it is a little different. And the bullying isn't how it used to be. We don't put kids in lockers or trip them in the lunch room. It is a little more verbal, even with the guys.
I don't know if it is like this at other schools but I sort of hope so. These days kids don't bet bullied just for showing up in math class? Personally, I am against bullying, but if you want to make fun of somebody, pick on the "big and bad" kids who brag, they obviously have ego to spare.

Thank you for reading, and remeber, MEAN PEOPLE SUCK!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Recall

So, it seems there has been some controversy about my previous blog, Lexie the Flawless. I want to just clear this up for everybody now. I do not actually think I am flawless and perfect. That blog was written as a joke making fun of myself. I thought the picture of Charlie Sheen would have given my sarcasm away. But I suppose that problem is my fault, I should have been more flamboyant with my criticism on my own personality.

I watched an old home video of myself and MAN was I obnoxious. I spoke like I was a the queen of England, but I didn't have a shirt on! I was sitting there with my big buck teeth in blue sweat pants. I was five and had a voice like I have been smoking cigarettes for the past 45 years. And oh my goodness my speech pattern was just wacko! I told adults it was a pleasure to meet them. How everybody put up with me I have no clue.

I caught myself doing this today in the halls. I don't walk, I strut! I walk like I am a Cheetah Girl and to make it worse because of my 2 years in marching band, I roll my feet and am in time with anybody walking near me. I AM SUCH A FREAK! My amount of flaws is crazy and my ego is just a cover up it seems. So please don't be fooled, I am not as great as I say I am.

So my friends, foes, and that one person from Russia that reads my blog. Stay happy, humble, and keep a good sense of humor.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Things That Brightened My Day

This morning started off just plain awful. I stepped into a cold shower, I couldn't find anything to wear, my hair wouldn't behave, I stubbed my toe, and the list goes on. I just had a feeling that today was going to be no good. After my shower I hobble my way back to get some more sleep because I had plenty of time before the bus pulled up.

The first thing that made my day just a little bit brighter was I had the most bizzare dream. It had dragons and ballerinas and dancing taco's on sticks. It was just weird and insane. It was my kind of dream. So I woke up with a little smirk on my face.

Another thing that put me in a good mood was that there was a cold Fresca (no calorie, no sugar, amazing soda) waiting for me in the fridge. Fresca's can put me in a good mood no matter what. They are just so refreshing and wonderful!

On the bus my friend Tyler was telling me about a three foot Jamacian stuffed bannana that he won at the fair this weekend and attacking me with a stuffed sea turtle he had won.

Last but not least this morning right before school had started there was a fight between two guys. Both in a grade higher then me and one of the boys I have had a few conversations with and I like. He is a pretty good guy. This fight hit the ground and the civics teacher at the school and my bus driver ended up throwing both of them apart and getting nailed with a punch square in the jaw. From what I know he is ok. But the reaction of all the kids this morning just from one fight was crazy. People were acting like they had never seen anything other then lollypops and sunshine. I love silly people that over react. They make me happy.

So that is how my pretty crummy morning got turned around by some really stupid stuff. Hopefully the rest of the day goes well. Can't wait to see what else lies in store.

So my fellow internet users, continue being silly because it makes me happy!

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Tara the Terrible




Actually she isn't that terrible.


My beautiful, wonderful, silly best friend is tied with two other amazing girls for homecoming sophomore bride. I am so happy for her! On the outside she is a tall, long legged curly headed beauty. But man does she have a background story, Tara has a 6 foot daddy named Ted (more commonly referred to as cowboy) with a giant mustache, giant belt buckle, and giant cowboy hat. When you put it all together he looks about 8 foot. I have been friends with Tara Mak for a while now and we gone through some wild times. Four wheeling at her mommas, fish fry's at her daddy's, beating up boys at the taekwondo school, jumping on the trampoline naked in the middle of the night. She is one crazy cookie but she is hard not to adore. She is the kind of gal that when you go down town with her she will sing the Elmo song with you on the top of her lungs and then three minutes later get a guy's number. Tara isn't afraid of ANYTHING except spiders which she has an awful fear of, like hard-core arachnophobia. So making her watch the movie Arachnophobia about a whole lot of exotic spiders going around killing everybody probably wasn't a very nice thing to do, but to tell the truth it funny to watch her freak out. Tara is just a doll, she will help a friend in need and has helped me through a lot. She isn't judgemental or rude, which is hard to find in a teenage girl now-a-days. Another thing about Tara Makenzie is she is a massive nerd not the pocket protector and runny nose kind of nerd but the Ninja Turtles, band camp, Dragon Ball-Z nerd. She is going to be Bulma, a blue haired anime cherry bomb chick for Halloween, and yes she still goes trick-or-treating with me. She cried when Micheal Jackson died and listened to Man in the Mirror all night. She blamed her daddy for eating her pig Festis when he disappeared for a week. And she dressed up like Steven Tyler and sang Dream On at Relay For Life.


So, vote for Tara for Sophomore maid 2011!


This blog was NOT approved by Tara Broughton, but she can deal.


Now to my readers, go out into the world look outside and feel the wonder of the Earth, just don't get struck by lighting.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Ethan Gets 10 Boyfriend Points in 1 Day


























Ding ding ding. My boyfriend is officially the best. No question about it. I hope all his big ole' football boys read this. They may give him some hardcore crap about this blog. But I feel I should put it out.

Point 1- Came and picked me up at 6 a.m. for my tournament in Bryant (45 minutes away) after getting four hours of sleep last night.

Point 2- He was totally happy with my almost one month again anniversary present (wrenches and camo seat covers for his truck)

Point 3- Was wonderful in the car even when we got lost and had to stop and ask two old men working at a hardware for directions. We took the directions and they were correct but man those men seemed very confused and out of their wits.

Point 4- Looked all of the intimidating, muscular, and crazy high ranking martial artists in the eye and gave them a good handshake. Kept up conversations and didn't act like a dumb teenage boy bored out of his mind waiting around to see his girlfriend compete.

Point 5- He ran all over the place doing elaborate errands for anybody who asked, whether getting mom money from her car or keeping score during a sparring match.

Point 6- He danced with me all silly like in public.
(I had to write it with a redneck accent, I felt it was necessary)

Point 7- He was sweet and supportive even when I was furious because I got confused about the judging and thought I lost both sparring and patterns.

Point 8 & 9- HE TOOK ME TO GO SEE LION KING IN 3D! (That is amazing enough it deserves 2 points)

Point 10- As soon as he got home he texted me to let me know he had a great day and that he already missed me!

Goodness he is the greatest. Thank you Ethan Joseph Obear for the incredible day. <3

And to all my guy readers out there, learn something for him and maybe you too can receive 10 boyfriend points in one day.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Another Friday Football Blog



My younger brother Sandor (pronounced Shawn-door) just started his first year of tackle football. He's not the biggest boy on the team and most of the boys did it last year but MAN, does he try hard. He isn't afraid to hit a big ole' kid three times his size. While the other boys will run up and hesitate and maybe push them back my little brother runs over these guys. he made three kids cry! That's a lot of little boy tears. Where did this steam driver come from. Where did he learn to run over these kids? Maybe it's from growing up with three older siblings. Maybe it is from me letting him try and tackle me in the yard. Maybe it is from his mix-training in ju-jitzu. I don't know where it came from but did the coaches faces light up when they see this giant redneck kids hit the ground.


Mom is so excited that the Hampo family will finnaly have a school athlete. Somebody we will get to watch run around on our turf and hear his name called over the intercom. Finnally one of our's that we can ring the most annoying cowbell for. Not one on the sidelines in the band or the one filming it but a kid actually playing in the game! I am so proud of my little, big headed, brilliant, kind, and apperantly athletic younger brother.


So to all my readers, go tackle somebody, make them cry. It builds character!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

PUPPY!!!

This morning I was sitting in this cold little corner, curled up in my oversized hoodie talking with all my buddies about crazy football fans, the Deadliest Warrior , and how dumb vegitarians are when this mangey old white and brown spoted pup comes and crawls in my lap. He just plops down and lays in my lap. This poor dog is shivering and is so beat up. I had no clue what to do. I wanted to just hold it and cuddle it, but we were at school and well, it was a really gross dog. It smelled putrid and was old and gray but the look in it's eyes was sad and lonely. I was in a pickle. Should I take it to the administration and see if they can find it's home, should I carry it around to class with me and see if anybody notices.

When the bell rang to go to first period the little dog jumped out of my lap and scurried away off to find a new high school student to beg off of. All day I have been thinking about this dog. What breed it was, what it's name was, where he came from. I am just wondering what this dogs story was. What all it has seen, and been through. I think that people underestimate animals. But of course, that is just my opinion.

So, in the words of my EAST lab teacher, "Go do something great!"

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

They don't want that!!!



It happens. Your boyfriends truck dies and you are stranded in the middle of no where so he calls his friends and they are NO help. They come and horse around and only make him more stressed. They pee in the bushes and pretend they are being eletricuted. So you, being the girlfriend, call up your dad who comes and saves the day with his handy dandy tools.

The next couple of days he won't stop apologizing to you and saying he will make it up to you but in complete honestly you don't care. You were just glad you got to see him. But still he feels the need to continue on with the "I'm sorry's". The ultimante solution, go out and buy him the part he needs for his truck. Spend that five dollars and buy him a new terminal.

When you buy him something he dosn't really want like a braclet that says "I'm hers" he will lie to you and say he loves it but he will loose that after you break up. He dosn't really want that. Go get him those tacky camo seat covers for his truck. Don't get him a new pair of American Eagle jeans, get him a new video game that he has been wanting.

And this goes for guys too. Trust me, we don't want that fake gold necklace in the shape of a key. Get us a new pair of shoes! That would be wonderful! You know what buy us some Asprin. We need it with the head aches the men in our lives give us. (Justin Gunnoe gave me that line). But for real we don't care about roses. They die anyways, spend that money on buying us something we actually want.

If you get him that part for his truck or that stupid xbox game he will love you three times more. And she will want that pair of cute Toms over the roses. ---<@ (that's a rose)
Have a wonderful day!!!!

:D --> Justins face.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

That Was Just Mean!



This is a follow up to my blog Punk Be Nice!

First period and we are just sitting around talking about anything and everything. A close girlfriend of mine says that there was a piece of glass in her foot and that she was planning on digging out with a knife but then she decided against it because, well, she thought about how bad of an idea that was. When an eavesdropper in our class asks if she had a pair of tweezers. She replied no and what happened after that took me by complete surprise. Another one of my best friends whom I love looks and says, "Well obviously not, have you seen her eyebrows". I was in shock all I could think about was how rude, unnecessary, and completely untrue that was! I looked in astonishment and simply said "Well that was mean" she smiles and responds with a classic "I was just kidding". Why was it she was the only one that seemed amused? I didn't think it was very funny and I don't think my now self conscious friend did either. I love both of these girls they are wonderful people but somethings just come out that shouldn't.

This is one huge difference between high school and the real world. No adults in a work place would dare say something offensive and uncalled for in fear they will be fired or sued. Things like that just don't fly on past high school. So when is it these brutally honest girls learn what to say and what to just keep inside their head? I can not wait til that day.

So! To all those students out there that go home and read my amazing blog after a long day at school. If you didn't know learn anything today, just remember
BE NICE!!!!!!!!! (look I even changed the color and bolded it!)

That is all! Thank you for reading oh fabulous blog readers! Keep it up!

Monday, September 12, 2011

Lexie the Flawless!



Lately my self confidence has been sky rocketing, which means I am perfectly capable of defending what people claim my "flaws" are. To be honest I don't have any. And I am not cocky because being cocky is a flaw and I said before. I have no flaws. This weekend seemed to be a bash Lexie kind of weekend. Mary and Mom just kept throwing out new things they think are wrong with me. This is what I think of that!


Mom says I am too competitve but I get it from her. We were sitting in church Sunday going through the bulliten when mom comes across "Casorole Contest!" in big bold print she nudges my shoulder and circles the page. My mom has never made a casarole she just wants to beat out those poor old church ladies who have been following family recipies for decades. She begins to jot down ideas for casoroles like barbeque chicken with mashed potatoes and something crunchy on the top. So what if I challenge everybody at everything I do. I'm not a bad winner I just like winning. I see nothing wrong with that. And I don't think my mom has any room to talk.



My boyfriend loves to tease me about how I am anti-mushy. He could poor his heart and soul out (which by the way isn't where emotions come from) and I would more then likely laugh not the mean, "you suck" kind of laugh but more of a "you are such a doof" kind of giggle. I am not big on the lame romantic movies like The Notebook or Dear John. But some people seem to think that I am twisted like a twizzler. I just think they are jelous of my awesomeness and stability.


Like I said my self confidence currently is at an all time high. My catch phrase is "have you met me?" as in if you have you are the luckiest sucker alive. Everbody wants to meet me and that is just true. There isn't a way you can't love me! I don't see how people can consider self confidence a flaw when obviously they are just envious of my bright glow. And to all those "haters" envy is a flaw.



So now you have met my not so humble side. Hope you arn't too intimidated and stop reading my posts. Leave me a comment yo!

Sunday, September 11, 2011

The Crazy Life of My Sister Mary Part 1

O Mary! My sister is probably one of the most bizzaro people on the planet and I was lucky enough to get to grow up with her. This is the sister who has a pet dog named Cal (like Calvin Kline) that I swear looks like a little white fox and acts like Paris Hilton. Most dogs seem to want to please their masters but not Cal, he has this "Screw you" look in his eyes. This snooty little inuit refuses to sit down outside because he dosn't want to get his pristine white fur dirty but when he came over to the house Cal peed on my younger brothers foot. Now what I don't understand is my sister also has a cat. A cat which Mary and her boyfriend Richard managed to toilet train how in the world they pulled off that magnificent feat off is beyond me . I think the shaddy neighborhood my sister lives in was all the motivation Mary's cat needed to learn to pooooooop in the toilet (gotta love the word pooooop). I know I would, considering Mary's little Asian neighbors actually got robbed at macheti point. Yea, macheti, like the huge ninja sword. This intruder held this massive sword to the Asian mans belly and stole all their stuff. Because you need a license to carry a gun but any bad guy can buy a fricken macheti!


So, that is the story of Mary this time. My beautiful, wonderful, crazy, brilliant older sister.

Leave me a comment please! I'm lonely and I used the word poop!

Saturday, September 10, 2011

No More Butt Songs!

Man! You know what I think the radio now is missing? Songs with a meaning. It is so difficult to find songs on the pop radio stations that arn't about drugs, getting drunk, or bootys. I miss the songs like Where is the Love by The Black Eyed Peas. If that song dosn't get you thinking about the world around you I don't know what will. This song is beautiful no matter what kind of music you listen to. And it was performed by a "cool" band. The Black Eyed Peas really were on to something when they released this song in 2003 on their album Elephunk.

After I heard this song on my ipod another song with meaning came on that I had never really payed attention to is the the song Secret Crowds by Angels and Airwaves. One of my favorite lines out of this song is:

"If I had my own world
I'd build you an empire
From here to the far lands
To spread love like violence"



To spread love like violence, what a great line! If everybody out ther could think like Tom DeLong, famous from being the lead vocalist in Blink 182, sings the world would be a better place.




So if by chance any lyricsts out there. Write something about saving the children and the people of the world! No more butt songs!!!

Friday, September 9, 2011

GO COBRAS!









It's friday! And here at Fountain Lake all that means is GAME DAY! In the fall it is all about football. Everybody loves coming out and supporting our cobras! It is a lot like the song Boys of Fall by Kenny Chesney. Just as country and dedicated. All the girls wear the boys jersey's around the school on Friday. Our goofy, muscular, boys stand in chairs at lunch and chant about how great they are. The cheerleaders dance around the cafiteria and well, it's adorable. The fans wear torn up, oil stained, jeans with an old t-shirt and a baseball cap. The cowboy boots clomp on the metal bleachers as the parents in the stands jump up and down when "their boy" gets an interception. The dads of the crowd go on about how nice our brand new turf is and how much turf burns must sting. It is hard not to be happy on a Friday night down here. But one thing that gets me, is every night before and after the games a prayer is said. Not saying that our beloved cobras win, but that nobody gets hurt. That everybody is safe and plays with good sportsmanship. I love it. So for all of those people out there that say country songs are over-exagerated and there isn't really a place out there like that come take a visit to little ole Fountain Lake because we really are exactly like the songs say we are. Just a little country school in a little bitty town that loves us some high school football!


So I wish all the boys luck tonight against Boonville!


Leave me a comment and let me know you care :)

Thursday, September 8, 2011

RLLY??? >:(



A few weeks ago I came to school and a friend of mine came running up to me so excited because a guy she had been crushing on the past two months asked her out. She is jumping up and down with a smile bigger than Alaska on her face. Being the everyday teenage girl that I am I ask for the details. She whips her phone out of her back pocket and shows me a single text from him that said, "Hey cutie! Wanna be my girlyfriend?? (;" (Yes, with the winky face). I held back my mocking laughter. I mean really? You are going to ask her out over a TEXT?! And girlyfriend? I mean come on!! At least make it seem like you won't treat her like dirt. Put a little effort into it. I wanted to tell her not to accept it because all that shows is he dosn't care enough to do it in a meaningful way but instead I hug her and give her the classic "If he hurts you, I will hurt him three times worse" Which in this case, I was dead serious about.


But wait! It gets worse! Last night another friend of mine called me furious as can be because his girlfriend had broken up with him. I tried to be comforting and kind until I heard that this snooty, stuck-up, dummmy's desion was over facebook! She didn't even have the guts to break up with him in person. She changed her relationship status on Facebook to single. If that isn't a low blow I don't know what is. I mean, way to be a coward. Breaking up is (or should be) an important descision. Not something to be dealt with over facebook. Technology is playing such a large role in teenagers lives now, and honestly I am ok with that. But I mean really chick? Have the guts to do it to his face.

So please if you have anything important to say. Say it to them in person. Wait until the next day when you see them at school. It will give you a little more time to think about what you say and you can at least make them think you care. Because if you are going to do something via text or Facebook. That just makes you a painsy baby.

Leave me a comment! I promise, I won't bite!!!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Punk! Be Nice!




I was walking through the hallway today and I realized that some teenage girls are just brutally honest. They say the harshest things and then say no offense in front of it and thinks that puts them in the clear. It is insane. I don't care how close of friends you are with a person you NEVER tell a girl she is fat, or too skinny, or has an awkward face. That's not being a good friend that is just being rude.

A good rule of thumb is If you can't fix it, don't' diss it . I know it sounds lame but if you keep that in mind you may save a friends day. If a friend of yours is having a bad hair day and you can take them in the bathroom put them in front of a mirror and fix it, then yea, it's great to let them know so they aren't walking around with huge birds nests in their hair. But if they decided to wear an outfit that looks like it is off of Ugly Betty and it just looks tacky. Go along with it. Don't tell them they looks like a blind artists easel. All that will do is make them self conscious all day and make you look like a jerk.

Another rule of thumb is if you have to start a sentence off with "No offense" or "I don't mean to be rude" you are probably going to sound rude or offend somebody so just don't say it! Saying "no offense" doesn't put you in the clear to say anything you want. But some people treat it like that is a pass from the heavens to insult at will.

BE NICE!!!!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Turn up the Heat!



My newest pet peeve has been discovered.
I despise cold classrooms. I understand that most teachers have heard that keeping the room cold will keep students awake and it is more sanitary but it just makes me want to curl up in a blanket and sleep as an attempt to control my shivering. I don't understand how teachers expect us as students to learn about quadratic equations or the Civil War when we are worried about getting hypothermia. Because honestly I am more concerned about my fingers turning blue and falling of rather then what an hyperbole does and how it enhances writing.

My last period class I hunkered down in my boyfriends jacket with the hood up and it zipped up to my neck. I put my head down on the desk and slept and I wasn't the only one! Cold class rooms just make for grumpy, whiny, and shaking kids. And who wants to teach them? So teachers, it really isn't that much to ask. Would you please please please turn up the heat in your rooms. And who knows, maybe the class average will go up.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Mean Girls are Stupid!



Movies about high schools have been driving me nuts lately. High school is not as bad as everybody makes it seem. Although there are the hard core jocks, and drama queens. Most of the school is in the middle. Sure! Things happen, people fight, and lie, and cheat, and steal. But generally I come home in a good mood with the same friends I had yesterday.

Last week I got so ticked off at girl because she hits on my boyfriend and messes with people in the band. The band is a family whether other people like it or not. I made my Facebook status "I just want to punch everybody in the face". But unlike in the movies, I didn't set myself up for drama by putting her name or anything specific about our argument. So most of the school had no idea! There are so many stupid mistakes characters in movies make. My goal for the year is not to become the average lame teenager blogger that hurts people's feelings in order to make themselves feel stronger but instead somebody who writes about her great friend, family, and all the silly stupid stuff around her. Thanks for reading!